Naturally, humans are social and emotional beings, we are always fond of striving for social and emotional connections regardless of who. For instance, when a baby is born, the only person he feels attached to is his mother, and no one else.
When mama leaves, even for a moment, with or without any reason, the baby will feel vulnerable immediately, and the only right way for him to show displeasure is to cry out as loud as possible. When mommy comes back to pacify him, he may or may not be easily calmed down, but most often than not, they do.
Essentially, as humans are that much vulnerable when attached to a person, it is very important to make sure to create a safe environment for your partner where they can be themselves with no judgement from anyone despite the fact that they may be flawed.
It is important also to make sure that they feel valued and accepted regardless around you. This is what can be termed as a safe environment or a safe space.
This is a huge aspect of any relationship. When a relationship is to fail, it depends on this, and when it is not, the same applies.
The person who does this in a relationship is both parties. It means to be a safe partner. It is your job as a safe partner to make sure your partner is their ideal self without you making them feel any less loved.
There can be no way, where only one person has to be the safe partner in a relationship. It is never done anywhere in this universe.
Therefore in this post, we will highlight ways to be a safe partner and the reasons why you need to be a safe partner. Please read further to learn more.
How To Be A Safe Partner
Becoming a safe partner is crucial for your relationship, you must learn how to make your partner have that emotional safety. They have to know that regardless of how flawed they maybe, there is always that one person that is always going to be there for them. And in order to do that, below are some of the things you can do, that will make your partner feel safe with you at all times.
Listen To Their Needs
A safe partner is one who has the time to listen. For your partner to feel safe with you, listen to him or her attentively you must know however that, listening and hearing are two different things.
When you listen, you are actually conscious that you intend to know what your partner is saying while hearing is when you just hear without any intention of listening, you are just perceiving sounds and nothing more.
A good listening skill is a great asset in any healthy relationship. Because with that, you are both able to tell the other what you have in your hearts and have that feeling of being appreciated and valued by how much your partner will pay attention you.
A typical good listening skill is when you put away any form of distractions when your partner is intending to talk to you, also when your partner talks to you, make sure to look into their eyes, it makes the conversation more intimate and engaging, such is what is required of every healthy relationship.
However, concerning how you look into your partner’s eyes, make sure to not do it just for the sake of it but for what it really means. Because when you just look into her eyes because this blog says so, then you do not know the essence of an ideal communication.
However, when you do so knowing why you do it, you are able to instinctively break the gaze without making your partner feel uncomfortable.
Essentially when you listen attentively to whatever your partner wants to tell you, whether you feel it would probably be one of their useless ramblings or not make sure to make them feel appreciated by actively listening to whatever they have to say, it will make them feel and know that they mean a lot to you, thereby making them open up to you more.
Prioritise Intimacy
Intimacy is one way to keep the flow going just the right way. It does not matter how you view it. But it is important to know that, it is the fuel in every relationship.
When intimacy ceases, the love and everything else in the relationship also ceases. It could be just talking to each other for hours in bed, getting to understand just how the other thinks.
Also, you can be intimate through sex. It is one great way to deepen the relationship and to sooth each other’s vulnerabilities. When people in a relationship becomes intimate, it is not the same connection you get by going on a first date, or the sex you have on your honeymoon. No, this connection is on a much deeper level.
It is what is achieved through practice so much so that when you are by each other’s side, it is more than enough climaxing.
With this much sensation going on through a body, you can imagine how a person will feel safe when with you. Therefore regardless of what form of intimacy it is, have the time for your partner and get It done with.
Be Available Regardless
One other thing to know that can make your partner feel safe with you at all times is to be available. Always. Be available no matter the situation, that is what the married couples say, through rain or shine. Make sure to be available for your partner emotionally, mentally in whatever aspect. Just be there.
The more your partner gets this realisation sinking in their head, they will feel warm inside and they will know that someone care for them in a deeper sense.
By doing this you help to create around them an environment where they can be themselves whenever they are with you, another trait of a healthy relationship. Hence your partner will feel safe whenever you are around him or her.
Respect Their Boundaries
To understand this concept better. Boundaries are more like when you tell a person to not go through your phone. It is a boundary. Or better still, it is what you feel is okay and what is not.
Boundaries can be scary sometimes but they are what keeps every relationship strong and healthy. It makes you keep true to who you are. When you set boundaries your partner knows when not to cross that line.
Every person has their own unique boundaries, that is one thing that makes every single person beautiful out there. Because without it, people can do certain things to you and may not know that you actually were not down with that.
But then, they would have gone Scot free because they did not know, and you however would be here reading this article with hate in you, which is not good for your mental health.
Therefore make sure your partner knows and understand your boundaries so that, you will not be by each other’s throat when something like that happens.
Likewise try to have regards for your partner’s boundaries. Refrain from making them uncomfortable by imposing your needs and wants on them at the expense of the boundaries you are aware of.
It can be avoided, please do acknowledge and respect this. And when you do, your partner sees how much your really value them, making them more inclined to feel safe with you.
Be Accepting Of them
One other way to be a safe partner is to know how to accept your partner no matter what or who they are. Mostly, for relationships to work, there ought to be no secrets, and the absence of secrecy means you both know each other’s deepest secrets, unless one or both of you decide to still keep some, if not, then you all would be made privy to the strengths and weaknesses of the other as well as their flaws.
In that case, be sure to not be judgemental. Also, know that when your partner does something or anything it does includes crossing your boundaries, learn to accept them and forgive them.
This does not mean being a fool for the sake of love, also this blog does not implore you to be a fool for the sake of love.
That is not what is going on here. Definitely, a straight person will see when they are being fooled, but then whether there is harm in what your partner did, make sure to overlook somethings because that is how relationships are.
We make mistakes we talk it through or overlook them with no hard feelings and then move on.Also, aside from that, learn to accept their point of view. Learn to accept and understand what they tell you, whether it will be meaningful for your cause or not.
Just know that, before that suggestion came out of your partner’s mouth, he or she took time to think of it before it actually got to you, therefore do not refuse right away, take the time to tjink and understand what your partner said. Better still, you can ask for clarification in a more loving manner.
This will give your partner that his or her thoughts actually appeal to you. It will naturally make them feel safe with you at all times.
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Show Genuine Interest In Them
When you let your partner have the feeling that you actually care for them, and you show that they appeal to you in every sense and way regardless.
When you do not just say it but you mean it. It make them feel always happy to be by your side.
When ever they are far away, they would always try to find ways to come to you, just to enjoy that quality time you always give them. Like I said it does not necessarily have to be sex. That quality time can be cooking together, or doing laundry together anything.
But in every single moment you spend together as partners, make sure he or she gets to know for the umpteenth time not through words alone but through actions. It is true that it becomes taxing with time.
But with consistency and practice the person practically becomes you. And later on it would not be taxing any more but the sheer pleasure alone would make you want to be with them always.
Appreciate Them
For you to be a safe partner, you must know how to appreciate your partner. If you do not know, you learn. You must appreciate them when they do anything significant or not. It is their effort and so you make sure to applaud them whenever they do.
You might think it is kind of over indulging but it still makes them feel valued and wanted. Therefore, they would try to do more to gain more of your appreciation.
It makes them know that they can be themselves with you, as you appreciate even the tiniest things they do for you.
Finally Be Honest
Honesty is one sure way of building trust in any relationship. When your partner sees how truthful you are, they are more likely to trust you more.
They believe you have the credibility to hold their hearts safely. Therefore they trust you with everything.
So much so that, although they may be vulnerable. They actually feel safe because it is you that holds their hearts.
Why Do You Need To Be A Safe Partner?
After learning ways and means and things to do to be the safe partner in a relationship, you must understand why you need to develop that personality. And to know that, we have listed them as follows.
- You are able to create meaningful connections with your partner
- It promotes both of your self esteem
- It helps to protect your mental and emotional health
- It enhances ones life expectancy
- It promotes happiness
- It relieves stress
- It helps to strengthen your bonds
- It is the ideal way to show your partner what they mean to you.
Final Words
Being the safe partner in a relationship can be stressing and tiring. The sacrifices you would need to make just to keep that relationship strong and going. They are all tiring.
But they are actually worth it. It goes a long way to cover you if it becomes a part of you. Even if the relationship does not work out, this personality of yours can make your future partner a very lucky soul.